Page 20 HIGH GEAR-APRIL 1981
Timid Freddy
By Louise
(To be sung to the tune of "Timid Frieda")
Timid Freddy is no drinker
but on Sundays
until eleven
he sips lite-beer
over ice-cubes
in a gay bar he lives near.
This past Sunday
he was weeping
lots of salt tears
into his lite-beer,
and the hot tears
with the ice-cubes
made the beer both weak and warm
Timid Freddy
is no bar-fly
in a side-booth
he sits Sundays.
not a smoker.
cigarette smoke
makes his eyes red, "makes"
them hurt
Being discreet
is Freddy's valor.
His eyes water
(as once he's told you)
And the anguish
was not remarked on
that caused his silent tears
Timid Freddy's
not a burden.
He is cheerful
and most attentive
an eager host who's
conscientious
with someone in his bed.
He's not forward,
He won't flatter,
But his smile's warm,
he hugs you closely.
He's not much on
exposition
but the last two acts convince.
In an era
that goes for fast food Freddy's fare
is home-made wholesome. You don't feel he
wrecks your system. Ta tá is with a smile.
But alas our
Freddy's soulful. Another soul
he wants to nourish
but the guys he
usually drinks with
The smiling dream
he'd loved last summer homilized,
Father O'Macho. Sunday drinking
he had met him
Timid Freddy
is no burden,
would not lure you from any duty.
"Obligations
to me must end, dear,
and he smiled like Errol Flynn. when your vacation ends.
He was not in
priestly garb then. Chomping breakfast, he first mentioned what his place was in the busom
see him as a swell hors d'oeuvre. of Holy Mother Courch.
Along food lines
are hasty chompers,
down their throats
life's brew they're chugging and our Freddy
between the mixed drinks is a sip of Perrier.
Though most minds stay in a muddle
still he's glad to
help clear some palates. Among the gaudy crumpled fabrics Freddy stays Sta-Prest.
He's accepted human weakness. cultivates consideration.
Just don't stab him
in the back and
he'll never stoop to slug
But last Sunday
all stooped over
in his lite-beer
he wept most grimly.
To his mother's
church in Brookpark
he had been to "Mass" at one.
The priest had so then smiling warmly "When's the next time that i can see you? Startled Freddy
thought while trembing.
"Spirit's willing, * is weak."
Freddy judged no.
lest he be judged
I'm real happy
we've been loving
but other ways
will others need you.
We re in love,
know how to love but
lots of people don't know how.
"I don't know if love is taught or love's a iaieni
that we've been given.
I've been praying
all those others
will someday be alive. I'm so ashamed,
then embraced sweet Self-delusion I might start crying
thinking, "If he
needs an outlet
I'd be doing lots of good."
"Human frailty
a priest should know of though obliged
to do some scourging. Priests should know
which backs are tender,
while confessing what I've been doing looking down on
those who don't love.
Eight months later Timid Freddy took his mom to church in Brookpark, at the Mass at one heard preached there a most moving homily.
The new priest there. Freddy's loved one from last summer. Father O'Macho.
boldly spoke against perversion
and accepting evil gifts. Freddy's loved one all last summer like many he-men liked being passive. even joked then
It feels less blessed to give than to receive." The priest's beauty, especially smiling, had both young and old admiring
though I've usually kept it hid but Timid Freddy
Despising pity
sets off hatred
loaded into
some people', envy.
try to bring you Christ with love." Just one person
June through August
they were lovers.
Three warm months
was Freddy blissful
and since Freddy
is not possessive
at final parting he felt good.
Lover leaving?
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At this point was Freddy's mouth stopped
by his loved one s
most ardent kissi.
and embracing
not before felt
sat there stifling
and was not melted down.
Loving Freddy
felt all stifled
as the priests's words his ears were hearing as if sealed
within some coffin beneath many tons of dirt.
When the time for
the Rite of Peace came (not called "the Kiss"
from these strong arms so harc since the Nineteen Sixties)
All you heard for
several moments was Freddy's
most quiet breathing -through, the nostrils since the lip lock continued on and on. Timid Freddy
although it felt good noticed his
was the only breathing.
his eyes opened,
met with looking
at the sight of
only hand-shakes
Freddy felt like throwing up. Hypocrisy
our Freddy thought was like the Devil
some vague abstraction. Now the Devil
has a person
and hypocrisy a smile.
Freddy's mind is
like a pond with
from unmoving depths of blue. bright green tendrils
What the thoughts were
behind the blue eyes
did not seem wise
to be inquiring
to our Fred
an instant later
released from kiss and hug. "I will see you,"
the loved one whispered and bit gently
un Freddy's ear lobe Freddy heard him
turn the door knob
They had lingered at the door.
When he'd stepped out
through the doorway one last time
he looked at Freddy. from the hallway
flashed a smile which
left Freddy melted down.
and pretty goldfish
A dying pond now
is what he feels like
in which crass boors have pissed. Freddy's mind though
is not yet stagnant.
His bright green tendrils. like other green plants while still living respond to sunlight, manufacture oxygen. Though now stunned, the pretty goldfish won't all die
too prematurely
if you're more than
just a shadow
and can limit your abuse.